Five Law of Attraction Myths | Good Vibe Blog

5 Law of Attraction Myths

Five Law of Attraction MythsThere are a lot of misconceptions in the general public about the law of attraction.

But even deliberate creators hold misunderstandings about manifesting.

Here are some of my favorite law of attraction myths:

Myth #1 – You’re supposed to feel good or be happy all the time.

That’s not just impossible (for most of us), it’s not even preferable.

For one thing, 24/7 joy would get boring after a while; and for another, contrast is part of the whole creation process.  It’s not only expected that we’ll run into negative emotions, it’s virtually required.  Without negative experiences and thoughts, we don’t have new desires.  And new desires fuel the whole expansion of life.

While deliberate creators know that bad moods are actually highly beneficial, we also know not to get stuck in them.  We don’t have to be in one for long to get the benefit!

Myth #2 – You can use law of attraction to control life.

Much as you might wish you could get your boyfriend to propose, or husband to get a job, or kid to stop smoking, or neighbor to move – you’re actually only ever in charge of yourself and your vibration.

We don’t use LOA to control others.  We use LOA to manage our own vibration and direct our own life experiences.

If I’m using law of attraction to get others to do things different so I feel better, I’m missing the whole point of vibration management.

Myth #3 – Negative thoughts are bad.

Sometimes negative thoughts are your best ticket to alignment.

When my neighbor once suggested we take revenge on our troublemaker neighbor by slashing the tires on his annoyingly noisey scooter, we burst into laughter at the mere thought of resorting to violence to improve our situation.

That negative thought brought a lot of relief.

Negative thoughts also contribute to our contrast, which as we know fuels expansion.  There’s nothing wrong with having a “bad” thought now and then.

Myth #4 – Manifesting what you want will make you happy.

New Priuses don’t make you happy; marriage proposals can’t make you happy; promotions at work won’t do it either – only YOU can make you happy.

You can manifest a world of things and experiences, but if you don’t find the happy vibe on your own, nothing else will take you there.

Myth #5 – You can create whatever you want.

Much as we like to say we can create whatever we want, the truth is we create whatever we believe.  That, unfortunately, is sometimes a big difference.

The work of a deliberate creator is to eliminate that difference.  🙂

* * * * * * * *

What are your favorite law of attraction myths?  Share them here to help us all get a better handle on this deliberate creation stuff.

  • April 8, 2011
  • @Whiffs of Bliss, I replied to you on my own site, but I’ll also reply to you here, because I have a strongly different opinion than you regarding LOA.
    I think using physical phenomena as metaphors for LOA or other phenomena outside our physical framework (but affecting our physical framework) is a useful approach—to a point.
    For example, I often tell clients who wish to discuss LOA, that is a neutral force, like gravity. It is not bad or good. It is not negative or positive. If you are walking, gravity is an ally to your progress; if you are jumping off a 10-story building without special gear or a trampoline under you, you are going to splat. In the latter case, you just used a neutral force in a life-limiting way. In neither scenario did the nature of gravity change, only your choices were different. Gravity just did what gravity does.
    LOA works the same way: it is a neutral force. However, I do not believe LOA is gravity, and I think it is misleading to write about them being one in the same.
    I do agree with the analogy that we may use LOA in our lives “like gravity” to attract and co-create.

  • @business review: Sometimes shining multiple lights on a material helps bring out its texture more to the otherwise unaided eye. 😉 While I almost completely agree with your post, sometimes discussion that bring perspective from psychology, physics, and other familiar sciences helps with assimilation and integration of a very simple LOA idea. 🙂
    As for the “almost” above: our negative emotion is about thoughts, but we need to interpret those thoughts. Sometimes the thought is showing us that the choice we are about to make is simply not our preference, and to go ahead with would not help us create a reality that we want. My point is that the emotion might be about thoughts that are negative about an otherwise positive situation, OR they can tell us more about our preferences. There are a couple of options there.

  • Whiffs of Bliss says:

    Some myths that have been preached by others have little to do with manifesting since humans have prospered for centuries in the absence of that information.
    Actually, “The Secret” Law of Attraction is all about Newton’s Universal Gravitation as postulated by Einstein, and others. Scientifically speaking, Gravity not only keeps us “down” on the ground, but it orbits Earth’s floatation “up” in outer space while attracting the sun and other celestial bodies to each other.
    Like planets and other species, people gravitate desires in a cosmic web of perfect co-creation. Regardless of myth or truth, we’re all attracting our emitted vibration.

  • business review says:

    We can skip the psychology…All we have to do is realize that when we have negative emotion this is a sign that our currents thoughts are creating a reality we do not want creating it by default. With thoughts that feel negative we push what we want away from us…The proper response to negative emotion says Abraham instead of wondering whats wrong with ourselves is simply to try different thoughts until we find one that makes us feel good.

  • Jussi says:

    It’s been really interesting to read your points of views and also the comments. Sometimes me too have felt stressed because I couldn’t be happy or in the good mood all the time. Now I know and feel a lot of better!

  • Rev Della says:

    You have brought up some very good points. I teach the LOA at our spiritual center and most people don’t realize that the LOA is not as simple to apply as it first seems.
    Myth 1 – I would love to be happy all the time, or even most of the time, but that isn’t what happens. Sometimes I get frustrated and annoyed, especially when the LOA isn’t working as quickly as I think it should.
    Myth 2 – I try to teach people to determine what the qualities are of what they want. Then they can focus on accepting the qualities of their good and let the LOA determine the best way to bring it to them.
    Myth 3 – So many of my students are afraid when they say something negative. They are concerned that the LOA is going to bring them something that corresponds to their negative statement. I try to get them to understand that the LOA is already bringing them situations that correspond to their negative thinking. When they become aware of their limiting beliefs, they can work on changing them.
    Myth 4 – I tell people that they have to be willing to have what they want and all that comes with it. Sometimes when they realize all the things that will change when they get what they are asking for, they decide that they really don’t want it.
    Myth 5 – I teach people to work on changing their beliefs so they can get what they want. Often that means setting a smaller intention that they can really believe in now, and then when that manifests, they can set a bigger intention.
    Rev. Della

  • Tammy Matthews says:

    Love, Love, Love it! I believe in LOA, but not the way it is presented in most instances. I love the way you put it here. It’s right on.
    I use the Law of Attraction to change my vibration, just as you described above. I, as recently as this past Thursday, realized that being positive ALL the time isn’t really what it’s all about. It’s about negatives happen to us all and if we can find a positive perspective it has the ability to change the entire situation.
    I have many negative moments and for a long time kicked myself for them. But I now realize they make me realize how good my life is and help me to find true joy in life, not just thinking a positive thought, but discovering how to live my life and love it.
    Great post,

  • Amanda, I’m glad you liked my take on attachment. It’s fun to practice as deliberate creators—trying out different tools and approaches towards the improvements we’re looking for. If we make it too serious, however, we actually lose our effectiveness. That’s when we get farther, not closer, to the core reasons many of us practice in the first place: joy and freedom.
    All the best to you,

  • Jashmi says:

    I want to thank you for clearing the air that surrounds some of the material around law of attraction.

  • Melissa says:

    Thanks for posting the calls, Jeannette. I will check them out!

  • Amanda42 says:

    Thanks, M. Kenneth for liking my post and for all your great insights. You’ve definitely given some food for thought! I especially like your take on attachment being “focusing on the gap.” That’s going to benefit me tremendously!

  • Carol Wiley says:

    I read often about “activating” the law of attraction, and I think that’s a myth. The law of attraction is always activated – the question is whether we are a vibrational match to what we really want or are we attracting by default?

  • Jeannette says:

    Ooh, “refreshing” – that’s a sign of a vibe moving into alignment! Kudos, Brittany!
    Melissa, we’ve got a great answer unfolding for you at Good Vibe U right now. Laura Gevanter just launched a new call series on the fundamentals of Law of Attraction. It’s so valuable I decided we should put it in a department for public access. She’s recorded the first call already, the second call happens this Thursday. (Check the calendar at GVU for details:
    Here’s the department where the calls will be stored, along with other material for getting started:

  • Melissa says:

    I believe in deliberate creation, I’m just not sure how to get in the manifesting zone. Do I just think happy thoughts? I think the reason I am not manifesting is because I don’t really understand “how” to do it, and then I get frustrated because I’m not receiving what I desire. How do I get there?

  • Brittany says:

    So helpful. I’ve been laboring under the delusion of Myth #1. It is refreshing to realize that negative experiences are only getting me closer to a more precise vision of my happiness. Have a great day all!

  • Hi Jeannette,
    First, thanks for your gracious responses to my barrage of thoughts. 🙂
    Next, let me clear up a few things about me. My first name is actually Mark (that’s the “M” in M. Kenneth). I make a distinction in names I use between the WordVibes/Photography blog and the SuccesWaypoint site to help keep searches for the first separate from the last, which is aimed more at business and coaching clients. Sorry for the confusion!
    My sites are: (Language and the Law of Attraction) (Coaching, Professional Development, SpeedReaching People) (Photography, thoughts, some technique).
    Last but not least, thank you for your kind words about my work. I’m going to be adding sites to the blog roll in the margin of the WordVibes site and you’ll be there soon. 🙂

  • @Amanda,
    I enjoyed reading your point about over-thinking manifestation and “attachment.” My own take on attachment means “focusing on the gap.” When I am playfully anticipating a manifestation, and it feels resistance-free to think about it, that’s a green light for me. No worries thinking and feeling about it all day long.
    On the other hand, as soon as I ask, “Where is it?” or “Why is it taking so long?” I know that I am introducing resistance, focused on the gap, and back in attachment.
    Good one!

  • @Stephan,
    I think that the term “You manifest what you think about” or “We get what we pay attention to” works conceptually as well as literally. In other words, since the Universe is brilliantly creative, and each of us always has competing desires going on at any given time, the Universe answers all things in a brilliantly creative way that fits within our consensus reality in a way that considers all our desires and energy diversions at any given time, and serves all.
    Therefore, if Ray thinks about cheerleaders a lot, he may not turn into one, but he *will* most likely run into them more often in the hallway; notice them in magazines; notice girls who remind him of cheerleaders; “accidentally” see them on TV; and if he is low-resistance in his desire to date one, might find that he actually participating on that level.
    This is a simplistic example, but I wanted to make a distinction. I don’t believe we always manifest *who* we are. In fact, we often manifest things that run quite against our grain, by persisting in thoughts that don’t feel good. I once manifested three car accidents in one year. It wasn’t pretty; it wasn’t who I was; but it was all about my habitual way of thinking at the time.

  • “Self-charade” – I hadn’t heard that term before, but I instantly recognized it from personal experience. lol

  • Hi Jeannette,
    Last post, I promise. I love what you did with Myths #3 & #4. I couldn’t agree more that we need to allow our “negative thoughts” voice, and that some “negative” thoughts are a step up from other ones. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I really don’t consider any thought inherently negative, but divide them more directionally, or according to comfort. Are you feeling lighter or heavier with this thought? Are you feeling more constrictive or expansive with this thought.
    In Myth #4, you are spot on. Let’s enjoy that car and that promotion because of WHO we are, more than what we have.
    Myth #5 is tricky again. The thing with myth #5 is more accurately defining what we want. I like your point about belief, and would like to add that well-begun is half-done (as someone wise once said). So, as far as conscious manifestation is concerned, beginning with a desire that “fits” and feels resistance-free is perhaps the most powerful way to begin *aligning* with it, which is the easiest way to manifest it. In fact, aligning is the ONLY way we actually manifest anything (as we can vibrationally align with desire), and action is how we deal with the manifestation.
    So how do we get the fit of our desires early on? It’s a highly personal process, but I notice in my coaching that few individuals pause to question the intent or other wants hidden in a desire. Those who do dive in to question why they want something and drill to the “feel better” drivers behind the desire are either further empowered towards realizing their desire (because they are aligned with it), or they dump it for another (finally understanding the self-charade they were about to embark on).
    Great to see someone posting this stuff so folks can discuss and dialog.

  • Whoa! I don’t know exactly what a blogroll is, but I want you on mine, Kenneth! Just read a bit from your blog – and LOVE it!
    for readers here who might want to check it out – very cool stuff!
    I totally get what you mean about noticing barking dogs when you’re tense. (Me too.) What I get from that is that we don’t HAVE to control others when we’re good at managing our attention/focus/vibration. That in itself is enough. Well, it’s all there is, so it better be! ha

  • Hi Jeannette,
    Myth #2 is a tough one to write about, because mental models for the term “control” differ from person to person. We create our own reality. All of it. Nothing occurs in our reality that is not invited by vibration. It is an attractive universe, so even that which appears as aggression, is attracted.
    So, we *do* control life in that we control what we attract into our perception, and then how we perceive it. What we can’t control is OTHERS.
    However, we CAN control how we perceive others, and what actions of others we both notice, and attract into our lives. This is important to understand.
    The other day, I was working on a presentation, and I was having challenges with one of the graphics I was building. Neighborhood dogs were barking incessantly in the background, and I begin to feel irritated.
    Deciding to take a break, I went downstairs to mentioned to my wife, “Man, how can our neighbors just let their dogs bark like that?” My wife calmly replied, “Hmm… I didn’t notice them.” It was then that I realized that those dogs are barking for a part of almost every day, and some days I notice them, and some I don’t. I notice them when I’m in a tense mood, but not otherwise. I realized that if I kept paying attention to them, instead of relaxing, I was going to get more annoying dog barking in my life.
    We are like the CEO of our own company (our lives). We set the strategy and direction of our life through our habitual thought, and generated vibration from that thought. Then the Universe does the heavy lifting. A good CEO doesn’t get all micro into every detail everywhere in a company he or she is leading. Neither should we. Like a good CEO, we set direction, tone, context for our lives, and trust in the competency and cooperation of the Universe to work out the details.

  • I like that you offered that distinction, Kenneth. (That happy all the time might actually be possible.) I’m not a fan of any limiting beliefs, and the thought that it’s impossible to achieve joy 24/7 certainly falls in that category!
    Thanks for that, I think it needs to be said.
    And I also appreciate your comment that thoughts aren’t really “negative” or “positive” per se. Rather, we either feel them as comfortable or not. But they’re not “bad” in and of themselves.
    As for whether continuous pure joy would be boring, that’s probably what return to Source is like, right? Boring probably isn’t exactly the right word for that – but I’m pretty sure that when I signed up for this go-round I knew/intended contrast to be part of the picture.
    Like Kimberly said above, I tend to appreciate things more after a little contrast. So I’m not ready to wish mine away just yet. But I think I understand the point you’re making.
    I’ll suggest this – when anyone here gets to report back as to what that’s like, I’m all ears.
    PS – yes, I think bad moods are beneficial. From the standpoint that it stirs up contrast, it’s step one material (from Abraham’s three step process), and good things come from it when we dial back into alignment.
    I’m hoping you’ve got a link to your material which I’m off to go check out now, since I love the thoughtfulness you offer on these topics! Thanks for writing, Kenneth.

  • Hi Jeannette,
    I read your “Myths” with interest, and as someone who studies and writes about #LOA myself, I’ve decided to contribute here by asking a few qualifying questions, and suggesting some fine distinctions. I will start with Myth #1, and move on to several of the others as time permits.
    RE: Myth#1:
    While I agree with you that it doesn’t serve any of us to feel bad about not feeling happy all the time, does that mean it isn’t possible? Sure, some individuals might find getting back to happiness easier than others, some personality types even enjoy melancholy moods, but I feel it is important to remember that happiness *is our natural state* and it is only thoughts squeeze off our connection with inner guidance and with source that can *diminish* happiness. Of course this doesn’t mean that we should suppress “negative” thoughts. In fact, no thought is inherently negative, and this sounds closer to what you are trying to get at. There are comfortable thoughts, and uncomfortable thoughts, and there are thoughts that are comfortable for one person, and uncomfortable for another. That which WE find uncomfortable is part of our guidance, and in that sense, is not negative.
    Further, do you really see pure joy as being boring? Isn’t that part of the condition that Abraham is in (pure positive energy)? I would venture that It *is* POSSIBLE to enjoy pure positive energy, but it just isn’t *likely* that we will maintain that in this physical life, or get through *this* life without some contrast—after all, contrast was part of the deal when we came her.
    I’d say knowing that we’ll get some contrast, while knowing how to open back up to guidance and happiness, is a pretty good approach.
    About bad moods: do you really consider bad moods “highly beneficial,” or do you mean that they provide beneficial information in the sense that they alert us to a condition. I could support “beneficial information” since bad moods are telling us that we are disconnected from source; or that our thoughts are separating us from who we truly are; or that we are out of alignment with our desires, etc. In that way, true, they are beneficial *information*, but not directly beneficial to our spirit or bodies.
    The fact is, bad moods produce enzymes and hormones that are not beneficial at all.
    One more thing about what you wrote in Myth #1: Do you really believe that it’s true that “Without negative experiences and thoughts, we don’t have new desires…”, or is it more accurate to say that you mean this is *one* form of sparking rockets of desire?
    Personally, I believe that we can seek improvement just for the sake of wonder or expansion. Negative experiences give us a very clear signal or marker on which we can pivot to see clearly what we want, BUT we can also generate desires from pure attraction (I created a model called the Desire Engine to explain this:
    Thanks for considering. I will continue through the myths as time permits.

  • I can see how that’s true, Tim – the different perspectives on that statement when looking at the individual vs. the whole.
    Thanks for reading and for posting!

  • Tim says:

    Great blog! I was thinking about this the other day. Take the phrase “you create everything in your world”.
    If you say that to an individual it sounds absurd, but if you say it to a people; such as everyone on the planet, or an entire culture or community, it sounds much more realistic. It seems that the phrase (or variations of it) becomes myth when turned to the self, but when we think of ourselves as part of a community, it takes an entirely different meaning.

  • I have sure found this to be true, Pamela! ” … different techniques can work better for certain areas of your life.”
    We’re getting quite a nice myth-buster list together with all this input! Thanks for joining in, Pamela!

  • Pamela says:

    Jeannette,Great myth list.
    Stacy and Ande, also agree with the having to take action to manifest.
    Both of Amanda’s myths really resonate with me. I know with my manifesting the more I “think about it” the more it slows it down. The manifestations that I let go of come much more easily. I also agree that different techniques work for different people and I’d also like to expand that different techniques can work better for certain areas of your life.

  • Yes, Ande, that action one I’m usually pretty quick to point out. Surprised I didn’t here. Maybe because I’d written on it recently:
    Thanks for chiming in on the conversation, my friend! 🙂

  • I have to second Stacy in the “have to take action to manifest” myth. It’s the one that is the biggest for me. Oh, and Nancy’s “this stuff doesn’t work” is big too.
    Another myth is that having the desire is enough, that if you want something and focus on it, it will come. It’s not about the focus–it’s about how you feel when you focus.

  • Thanks for sharing a perfect example of how it works, Kimberly!
    And kudos for embracing the process. 🙂

  • Through the Lens of Kimberly Gauthier, Photography Blog says:

    This is such a fantastic post and so very true. I had a bad time last night and I needed it. It didn’t last long, but I was having a brief pity party and out of that party came…
    1) a great chat with my mom and the realization that I love her and need her (we had a rocky time eons ago) and that she’s fantastic and was able to easily say exactly what I needed to hear, she was able to get me back into alignment with her love and words, and wow she was great and I’m blown away.
    2) the realization that my boyfriend and I needed to have a chat, that I was feeling a little envy and needed to address that with him, and we did have a great chat last night and I felt better for it today.
    I woke up with excitement and happiness and I’m back on track. Those “negative” moments are what make us appreciate the good times. It’s how we tell that we’re happy. And it’s a great barometer about where we are and what we’re attracting.
    My favorite myth is the same as Linda’s – that we have to be positive all the time and THEN LOA will work.
    Have a fantastic weekend.

  • No doubt, Nancy & Laura! I hear that one, too.
    Linda, thanks for your comment as well.

  • Linda says:

    ‎” If I just think positive thoughts LOA should /will work.”

  • Laura says:

    Or Nancy, how about “This stuff doesn’t work FOR ME?”. lol

  • Nancy says:

    My favorite myth: “This stuff DOESN’T WORK!!!” LOL! :o)

  • Michele says:

    “Myth #1 – You’re supposed to feel good or be happy all the time.” I definitely believed this one, as if I were not happy, I wasn’t following LOA or that I would attract more bad things.
    Thanks for this!!

  • Glad you enjoyed, Michele. Thanks for commenting!

  • Two great additions, Amanda!
    It doesn’t work the same for everyone, and there isn’t one “right” way to do it. And obsessive thinking about your desire may very well produce unintended results when attachment is present.
    Thanks for posting these!!

  • Amanda42 says:

    Myth 1: You have to spend a lot of time thinking about what you want.
    That’s actually counter-productive because letting go of the attachment is key! It is important to feel good about what you want and believe you can get it, and then stop dwelling on it. That way you get a high vibe on it without the desperate energy.
    There are great techniques like The One Command for getting in tune with what you want and then releasing it. When I catch myself dwelling on what I want, I remind myself, “I don’t know how. It is so now!” and I feel confident and loose and happy about it.
    Myth 2: The same techniques work for everyone.
    I realized I was writing about the “right” way to get aligned and manifest, but that is just what’s right for me! It might be totally different for someone else. Good thing there are so many great ways to go about it!
    P.S. Thanks for the reminder about bad moods and negative thoughts. I always forget that and feel like I’m doing something wrong when I get down. This is going to help me in a big way! 🙂

  • Stephen, that reminds me of when James Ray said that if it was as simple as “you are what you think about,” then in high school he would have become one of the football team’s cheerleaders.

  • Stephen says:

    Another myth is that you manifest what you think about. It’s a little more than that. You manifest who you are.

  • I can’t believe I forgot that one, Stacy! That’s one of my favorites to dispel! lol
    Thanks for posting it here. 🙂

  • Stacy @ Local Online Marketing says:

    My favorite myth is one you’ve touched on pretty passionately before – “you HAVE to take action to manifest”. I LOVE that that one is a myth!

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